Tell us the truth in stammering and stuttering advertisements

Most of it was probably nervous laughter, which can be infectious. Even so, I had a weird numb sensation of unreality and disconnection. It probably the mind protecting itself. Sometimes the you can have the easiest time during what should be the toughest speaking engagement. But as long as stammering is not seen as failure, we can stay strong. I never saw Gary Moore either. In my favouries there’s a Band called Heart. The dark haired singer has a stammer. So we’re in good company!

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I won’t ask here about the problems at home. Bad luck about the career change. It must be hard to avoid feeling bitter about it. What a waste. However, I know what you mean: I’ve had laughter on many occasions and I can clearly remember one presentation where I was blocking so badly that I was dribbling. Yet, last year I appeared before a Parliamentary Committee and my speech was amazingly fluent. Then I spoke somewhere similar and it was a real struggle. But I never saw Gary Moore live!

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One of your statements reminds me of a scene in Robert Graves ‘I Claudius’. When he, as a stammerer, had to face a doubtful and hostile senate for the first time as Emporer.

Keep the S in BSA!

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My stammer intensity varies widely. I once gave a presentation to upper management when my speech was not so good. I had to endure open laughter by quite a few of them. To cut long and torturous story short, I was forced to accept a Compromise Agreement. The real damage came after. Coupled with the problems at home, I mentioned above, my plans to be an electronics engineer collapsed. It’s a career that’s hard to resurrect.

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There are people in the BSA who stammer a lot, and some who hardly stammer at all – and there are non-stammering parents of stammering children and non-stammering partners of stammerers. So you don’t need to take an annual stammering test to maintain your membership! I’m still stammering away, and am fairly accepting of it, whilst stubbornly holding on to the idea that what I say is (hopefully) more important than how I say it. So I’m pretty sure that I will always be one of the Ss in BSA!

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I nearly took a job as a writer in an ad agency, but turned it down because I realised I was in danger of hiding myself away. So I went into marketing management – and got used to working with a stammer. The big point came when I was fired for stammering, when I was 31, and a Director of a marketing agency. One of their clients, BP, asked me round and suggested I should open my own company and pitch for their business. Which I did, and won. BP said they didn’t give a damn about my stammer.

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It sounds like you have succeeded. Was the struggle to keep your job the turning point for you? The others at BSA are disappointed because you must stammer to maintain your membership. Did you miss the S in BSA?

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Then maybe you and I are similar. I have always tried not to allow my stammer to occupy the centre of my life and, although there is a thin line between determination and obstinacy, I hope I have succeeded. This is not an advertisement for the British Stammering Association, which I joined a few years ago, but I can tell you that being a member allows you to speak with a sort-of corporate authority! Sometimes, when I see people on behalf of the BSA, they are disappointed if I don’t stammer.

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I think I have reached the point where communication is more important than how I speak. The old fears that dominated my inner world is far less. What is difficult, is dealing with discrimination in the home, or elsewhere, and the insecurity that comes from that. To live life to the full you need to have good emotions to carry you through. Like you, I still confront it but sometimes it like confronting a wall of denial and accusation.

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I don’t disagree with that! I’ve accepted that I stammer and, although there will be times when I’m much more or much less fluent, I will never be able to ‘cure’ it – and so I have got on with making the most of life. Is it the same with you? Thinking this way puts me in a position where I can, and do, challenge any prejudice. This is at least partly driven by having been fired and dammned near lost my job several times simply because I stammer.

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These days, I find the discrimination aspect more pernicious than the actual stammer. If I dare confront them about it, some find it hard to give reasoned reply. Others suddenly start to jump through hoops championing other disability causes. Like a shield to hide behind, and to justify their behaviour.

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I don’t actually know, Jeorney, but I suspect we do. People still tend to think that we stammer because of some weakness in our characters, we tend to hide our stammers as if we are are ashamed of them, and awareness of the condition is low because there is virtually no one who stammers who has a high profile. Yet, in the UK, there are access ramps everywhere and free wheelchairs for the mobility disabled, free hearing aids for the deaf and free glasses for many who are losing their eyesight.

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I was wondering if – or why – stammerers tend to attract more discrimination, when compared to other disabilities?

I’ve found it from all members of my family, including some friends & relations. Often it results in emotional abuse in some form or another.

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Hi, Dami. I think that happens to many people who stammer. I know, in my own case, that I often have to put so much into trying to control my speech that thinking about what I’m saying suffers! Speech is a bit like a road, along which words and sentences need to travel. But our roads are weaker and not as wide as most people’s so, when there is too much traffic, there are traffic jams.

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I have a stammer and have had it for years but what I what to know is if anyone else who stutters/stammers feels like that have difficulty not only speaking but also with trying to retrieve the right words..meaning they cant think of the word to use right away.

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@Squishymeister Enjoyed your comments.
Good luck with your work.
~be well

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-attention- reduced stuttering by doing something associated by physical activities like dance or piano
- suggestion- stuttering will reduce by power of suggestion, like hypnosis (but it won’t last long)
- tension and anxiety- high levels will increase stuttering a lot
- cue-related condition- cues of past difficulties (situational, linguistic, etc) will make stuttering more likely
- more fluent when talking to babies or animals
-more fluent when adopting fake voice (acting or accent)

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and grammatical class (more likely to stutter on content words for adults, more likely to stutter on function words for kids).
-word frequency (words you say less often are more likely to be stuttered on)
-predictability (when a word is less predictable, more likely to stutter on…so less information value words)
-linguistic stress (stressed words tend to be stuttered on more)
-communicative pressure (like talking to strangers, or giving a presentation) will increase stuttering
-

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There are lots of factors that could influence changes in stuttering. Generally the older you are the less variable it will be though.
-likely to stutter on same words when repeating a passage, indicates a learned behavior
-linguistic properties of words will effect stuttering (not to be confused with phonology)
-4 variable highly associated with stuttering (Brown 1230/40) = initial sound of the word (initial consonant), sentence position (near the beginning), word length (more than 5 sounds), .

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well… unfortunately MOST speech pathologist receive very little training on how to work with people who stutter, and therefore many don’t feel confident in doing so, or even worse do inappropriate therapies. I’m thankful that my program offers the course I’m taking, as well as the chance to work with clients who stutter. I’m not sure about speech paths in the UK though…as I’m in an American program. Planning on moving to the UK though, so I should look into it!
Keep fighting the good fight!

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I was wondering if anyone would know why my stammer changes from time to time. it can be were i can’t speak at all and other times i have to go ehhhhhhh before i speak. thank you for this video, very infromative

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Thank you for the work you are doing! It’s relevant, important and most certainly necessary!

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Thanks, Amber! Are there any more like you out there?!

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Thanks for putting this up! I’m currently a graduate student in speech-language pathology, and taking a fluency class/working with clients who stutter (doing youtube research to get better at fluency counts…) and it’s GREAT to see some positive self advocacy! I would also encourage people to donate to stuttering research, as we really know so very very little about the etiology and other factors of stuttering at the moment.

Thanks again for sharing!
~Amber

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Great to hear from you! Tried messaging but you have got friend lock on. This story is a continuing one and we have just reported five more Google ads and Google themselves have been cited in the adjudications as affiliate marketer – but they still don’t change their policy or reply to our letters. And I know John Bercow too. Talk on Skype? Please let me know.

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